There’s this guy at the hostel I’ve been staying at in Cancun. He only speaks Spanish, and we haven’t spoken much. When my iPod got stolen, he came over to me, and he said in Spanish, “What’s wrong? I know your iPod got stolen, but what else is going on?” He just knew. He passes me the joint every time there is one, even if I’m lurking in the corner. He gave me the last bit of his weed yesterday when I was desperate. When I was too distraught over other things to take care of my very infected knee, he disinfected it and bandaged it for me as I just sat there immobile. We don’t speak much, and he has never been hitting on me or anything. He’s just this very nice guy that can just tell when another human is in pain. It’s nice to know these humans exist.
Now here’s the very true story of what happened this week that I wrote a couple of days ago:
See I was wandering down a street in Cancun, when out of nowhere – JAGUAR! He got my knee pretty bad, and just as he was about to eat me, Fat Mike went back in time from the festival on Friday, while playing his secretly powerful punk rock time travel riff. But oh no! A rift in time was created, and as the T-Rex came out of the time portal, my iPod was pulled in! Unfortunately, the T-Rex ate a certain man, but Fat Mike was able to close the time portal just in time save everyone else. Phew! What a day yesterday was.
…of course, since NOFX cancelled their show, Fat Mike can’t come back in time and save the day. So I guess I fell hardcore while, uh, walking, and infected my knee pretty bad. Then as I was having painful times with a man, I was sitting on a street corner, a mere block from a crowded park. I was trying to get some wifi to talk to this guy, when a man casually strolled up to me… RIPPED my iPod out of my hand (breaking my headphones while he was at it), and sprinted.
I yelled, “NOT TODAY!” Then, as we passed my hostel, I yelled, “ROBBAR!” This, as it turns out, is not the Spanish word for robber. But it made everyone notice. Everyone saw. But he ran down an empty street, rather than toward the massive crowd. I am not athletic, and I just couldn’t keep up. Besides, what exactly was my plan should I catch him? Explain to him in perfect Spanish that I was just a broke traveller who was having a really bad couple of weeks, and could I please just have my iPod back? Or was I going to have the time to grab my pepper spray? I think I’d probably just be out an iPod and with a black eye.
The only thing that was keeping me going was seeing NOFX at a festival while visiting Mexico City on Friday.
And then they had to cancel due to family matters. Nearly $200 on the flight and ticket down the drain, though the saving grace is I get to see two very good friends there.
So that’s been Cancun.